It's the end of another exhausting week and you're no further forward than at the start.
You soon realise something about the endless list of stuff you’ve done - none of it was what you set out to do!
I coach leaders who want to stop saying yes when they’re already stretched, and start saying what they really think in meetings – even when others see it differently.
Let’s talk
I know what it’s like to feel you need to do more.
I started my career as an accountant, before moving into recruitment which in time lead me into coaching. It's no coincidence my work has become increasingly people-centric. I've spent most of my life being curious about people, and wanting to help. Coaching has taught me how to do this more effectively.
My coaching is evidence based, often examining the difference between truth and belief. I will listen to every word and question things you've never considered. I will help you untangle confused strands of thought, bringing clarity; and I will hold you accountable. And throughout all I will be patient, earn your trust and at times make you laugh.
Outside work, I love walking my dog Padstow, especially if there’s a pub with a good choice of IPAs at the end of the walk. I love cooking and barbecue all year round. I’m also rediscovering my Canadian roots and writing about what I’m finding along the way.
More about meToo much time spent controlling others’ perception of you
- You end another exhausting week wondering what you actually achieved. You’ve been flat out, but the things you meant to do are still on the list.
- You spend your days reacting to interruptions and other people’s priorities, then give up part of your weekend to catch up.
- You say yes when you’re already stretched, then feel frustrated with yourself and guilty about letting people down at work or at home.
- You spend too much time managing how people see you, from rehearsing how to come across in a meeting to rewriting a simple email for 25 minutes.
- You hold back what you really think, go along with decisions you disagree with, or double down when someone challenges you because you’re worried about looking weak or difficult.
- You work hard to be accepted, yet conversations feel strained and the people you want to connect with feel further away.
- You start questioning whether you’re any good at your job or showing up for your family. Even when things go well, the success doesn’t quite feel like yours.
- You feel like you’re living someone else’s story.
I call this the Performance Game.
What changes when you stop second-guessing yourself
You pause before taking on more work. You tell your boss where you disagree and why. When you don’t have the answer, you say so. Each time you handle a conversation that way, you build evidence that you can trust your own judgement. That’s where quiet confidence starts.
Explore my approachIn their own words
He has helped me learn to say no, to be assertive and to put myself first.
I feel empowered to take the next step and feel reassured that my investment in me is justified.